He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
