I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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