brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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