yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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