Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
