margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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