she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You dont lie about slip and slides
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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