dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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