Jerry, you need to find god
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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