What did we do last night that was yellow?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
