yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
