Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
