Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
