Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
now i know why i became what i already was.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
