can we get nightvision for the apartment?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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