You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Randomize
