Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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