it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
