My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
