Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
