apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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