"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
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