If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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