made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
My cat gives me a boner
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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