Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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