Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
