nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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