is your mom at the bar?
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
