how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
