At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
