she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
