Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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