He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
