Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize