Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Randomize
