You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
