what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
