is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
this just has baby written all over it
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
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