Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
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