he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
