theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
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