Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
