So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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