if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
