You work out of a Hotel?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
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