oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
