just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Randomize