Don't you send me to vm
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
