she was so not down for the gang bang
I skipped work to stalk him.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
