Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
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